I used to suffer through my job, my religion AND my relationships. I thought, “This is just the way it is. Life is hard. You have to make sacrifices. You can’t have everything.” I actually thought that by settling for less, I was being noble and humble… and that I would be rewarded with inner peace and joy.
I have come to know a very different Truth for me, which is that suffering is optional… and that life is supposed to be fun. I’ve learned that my beliefs are what held me back – every time, no exceptions – from the peace and joy that I desperately sought after.
When you settle for less than your soul-heart desires, you do so because of the limiting beliefs you inherited from parents, authority figures, society… and these were impressed into your consciousness even further by your own experiences. But remember, Life shows you what you want to see. You know this because I’m sure you’ve had the experience of remembering something different than it happened. Your perspective is everything! And it is changeable!
That is the best news… YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS. Try it now, asap! Decide that you don’t have to suffer through whatever it is that is gnawing at you. Decide that you don’t need to numb yourself from it, but instead, decide that it’s gnawing at you for a reason – that it’s your soul (or deepest self) talking to you, begging you to change your thinking.
I wish it was that easy – I’m over a year into therapy for PTSD and other issues, and I have wished a million times that I could just CHOOSE to see things differently, that I could just CHANGE my perspective and it would turn my life around. That I could FAKE it ’til I MAKE it.
But, while that’s not necessarily the way it works all the time (in its entirety, at least) it does help. Counting my blessings feels better than counting my troubles – and it seems I always have more of whichever one I’m counting.
Hi Brandi, when we go through major trauma the process of turning it into a decision to feel good or not, definitely seems like denial, being fake, and oversimplification. While the concept is simple, it’s not always easy – especially at first. The decision to deliberately feel good is absolutely something that needs to be decided on a moment-by-moment basis. When life is gnawing at us, I believe in the “Feel it to heal it” concept. We must face whatever is causing the disruption so that we can navigate it with consciousness, rather than ignoring the inner nudge and letting life happen to us. I spent a lot of time ignoring my inner wisdom and tolerated bad situations. When we know we are worthy of better, we will seek out the support we need to overcome… like you have with your choice to start therapy over a year ago. I honor you for that. It can’t be an easy road… but absolutely one that your future self with thank you for!! Much love to you, and all my best for feeling good!
A hard moment in life can be a good way to improve ourself. It is like a message saying “Okay, there’s something wrong in your life, go find it !”.
So, suffering has a bright side ! Otherwise, it should never be for a lifetime. Suffering should always be temporary. If it seems to be just “normal” for someone, you can be sure that he is wrong and just keeping himself back with limiting beliefs, indeed.
I think that the “tough life model” is still very existing in the christian based societies. At least in France. What about USA ?
Absolutely Alexis! I love how you worded that… “Go find it!” What an exciting invitation!
There are many pockets of the US where as you call it the “tough life model” still operates. I really feel that this is mostly very strong with the older generations. As the younger ones are growing up, they are more and more accustomed to a life of ease and abundance… However, that would be a complete generalization. There is so much variety around us… even in my small circle… it is challenging for me to identify themes especially because I feel that my perspective shapes what I witness. Thank you for reading, and for sharing your thoughts!!